What is 75 Hard and Who is it For?
75hard is not for everyone and I'm not saying you need to do any sort of challenge or program to achieve great things. For me, my current level of inspiration and productivity is an unintended consequence of doing 75hard and I am very grateful for it. What I am advocating for is taking control of time and making it be something that comes from within.
"I Don't Have Time For That" is a BS EXCUSE
Time itself is not a linear thing that controls us. Time is a concept that we agree on and think of as linear - but time really exists at all times . It was here before we were and will be here after we die. In this way, it is really what we do with the linear amount of time allotted to us that matters. If we know that we only get to participate in so much time, why then do we put off some of our biggest dreams and goals, trading them in for monotonous routines that provide comfort on the outside and a low level consistent feeling of anxiety on the inside?
In my opinion, it's because we are living out the values of our parents, significant others, and friends. We feel social pressure from 'group think', from our business colleagues, clients, and other individuals in our lives who insinuate either their approval or disapproval of your behavior. All human beings have dreams and goals. Most people would love to travel the world or achieve great financial success or own a successful business, write a book, or come up with a blockbuster app. However, our parents, often times meaning well and often times also projecting their own limits onto their children teach us about our limits and 'station' in life. I think this limiting belief system is installed in us at a very young age and reinforced by the people we chose to hang out with, people who confirm our existing belief system. Once you have surrounded yourself with people who get uncomfortable with any upward progression in your life, simply because it means you are now 'different' from them (AKA more successful or doing something they think they can't do), you have built your self a cage. The walls of this proverbial cage are fraught with criticism, micro expressions of envy, fake or superficial support, backstabbing, passive aggression, manipulation, the list goes on. Wasting time with anyone who is un-supportive is just that, wasting precious time.
So, what can you do? I can tell you what I did and what I continuously do. First and foremost, I love my parents. They have been great parents who are human beings with faults just like the next person. They are human beings with limiting beliefs, context and values from a different generation, and their own hopes and dreams - some of which got accomplished and some of which have been back burnered for so long it is really unknown if they even believe they can do it. My dad was a successful oil and gas entrepreneur and my mom a successful bank executive who worked her way up from teller to Senior VP over a 30 year career with the same company. These are goal oriented, hard working people.
Who cares what your parents, friends, xyz person thinks!
No really who TF cares?
These are also people who care deeply for their kids and in my view want nothing but the best for them. Yet, when I tell them that I'm about to embark on another 12 month journey, living in 12 countries in 3 continents, I can see a flash of resentment and / or negative disbelief come across their face. I can only speculate the true emotion behind the micros-expression as I hear a superficial voice of support but I can sense they are less than truly happy for me. As a pretty confrontational person, I try to prod and ask questions to figure it out but I'm met with the resistance we all dole out when someone calls us on being envious, resentful, judgmental, or contemptuous. We as humans are so uncomfortable with these emotions that we rarely admit to them.
What I found in the case of my parents, and even my best friend is twofold. One, I think that the things I am doing would have been only a dream for someone in their generation within their social group. When I embarked on it the first time there was hesitant support. Now the second time, I think there is a bit of 'who do you think you are'? I think my parents are very much stuck to the model of the 1980s and 1990s, imagining that for me to be successful I need to be in an office somewhere working 9-5. We know, and I think they know consciously that this is no longer the case; remote work has proven more productive over the past year with so many working from home during the pandemic. Secondly, I found that I think they will actually miss me and some of that discontented look might come from there. This makes me feel loved and realize that yes, some of the things I am able to do are considered to be wild by others who have never done them and that can spark some superficial feelings of envy and jealousy. However, with my close friends and family I think that passes quickly and they come to be happy for me in-spite of having to miss me.
Now, I'm not saying I'm this super missable person. I would like to think that, but you would have to decide for yourself after meeting me. What I am saying is that I can look for alternate explanations for lack of support that can give me a more positive sense of the people in my circle and by doing that I can get the support I need after an initial negative reaction. Rather than giving up on my goal in response to lack of support, I can take a moment, double down on what I'm doing, and give my loved ones the opportunity to feel happy for me after their own self-limiting beliefs have passed.
Navigate Group Dynamics - Be part of the right groups
I think all human beings do this. Whatever social circle, group, or community we belong to, there are unspoken expectations to what each member is to achieve, be, do say, etc. When someone in that group or community aks contrary or outside of those expectations, they receive negative feedback. This is why it is so important to plant yourself in groups and communities that are at the next level. They are where you want to be, achieving what you want to achieve. Being a part of these communities encourage you to level up so you can fit in with the group - achieving their level of success. Once you get there, it might be time to again change your affiliation if the group is not growing and challenging you anymore so that you are, every so often, upgrading your circle of influence.
Set Big Goals
One of the components of my personal goal achievement is ensuring the goals I set are big. Sometimes they are admittedly too big for the time period allotted and I have to adjust. Most of the time however, reducing the time frame I set for their accomplishment actually increases the chances of achieving the goal.
What helps you make sure you cross the finish line?
